The Tourist's Prayers
Dear God - Look down on us your humble tourists, who are doomed to travel this earth, taking photographs, sending postcards, shopping for souvenirs and walking around in drip dry underwear.
Give us this day divine guidance in the selection of our hotels and lodges, that we may find our reservations honoured, our rooms made up and hot water running from the taps.
We pray that the telephones work, and the operators answer and speak our language.
Lead us, dear Lord, to good, inexpensive restuarants where the food is superb, the waiters friendly and the wine in included in the price.
Give us the wisdon to tip correctly in currencies we do not understand. Forgive us for undertipping out of ignorance and overtipping out of fear. Make the people love us for what we are, and not for what we can contribute to their worldy goods.
Grant us the endurance to visit the Lodges and Game Reserves listed as "MUSTS" in the guide books.
And if perchance we skip an important game ride to take a nap after lunch, have mercy on us, for our flesh is weak.